Seeking

Forever I seem to be seeking,
holding my voice and never speaking
of thoughts through my mind ever streaking,
though through my fingers they are leaking,
and through my neurons tend to be creaking.
Nonetheless I endure critiquing,
as if all wish me to be tweaking
and at future self I am peeking -
though 'tis hard to see through the shrieking
that my flaws all need careful sleeking.
My suspicion tends to be sneaking
that love and friends be only ekeing
by minimally, my misspeaking
responsible for them all freaking
out at the havoc I am wreaking.
When my madness is at height peaking
and senses of injury piquing,
heat and cold through my brain are squeaking,
insanity like odor reeking,
this is when comfort I am seeking.