The inability
to feel pleasure -
it is a simple definition,
too simple.
No activity brings joy.
Even usual pleasures are thwarted.
It is as if there is some blockage in sensation,
some lack of sensitivity,
to positive stimulation of any kind.
Pain may or may not be present.
What is significant is the
complete
and utter absence
of all pleasure.
Water fails to refresh.
Food fails to sate.
The fire is cold, the wind does not move you.
Orgasm may even occur for some, but brings no completion.
Basic self-care cannot even give
a sense of responsibility
or humanity.
All attempts
to achieve even a modicum
of comfort
provide only frustration.
My coping mechanisms are exhausted.
The end is in sight
but it is never close enough.
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